Ashes to Ashes
by monophobia her
Summary: ...you've got me f a l l i n g apart [AkuDemy, impliedonesidedAkuRoku]]Characterdeath[ Here I am allowed, everything all the time.


AN A short, not-so-happy AkuDemy. Mhm. It's not that great but I enjoyed writing it. So, feel free do read and review if you feel like it. They provide me with hope and inspiration, mkay? I was playing one day and an idea popped into my head at the Proof of Existance.

WaRnings Character death, Axel's potty-mouth(once) and yaoi.

Disclaimer The beautifulness that is Axel and Kingdom Hearts belongs to SQUARESOFT//Disney, alright? Oh, and 'Idioteque' is a song beloning to radiohead. I own nothing but the idea, but I'm not all that sure about that either. We all copy someone, neh?

So..Onto the story...

* * *

The Proof of Existance didn't lie...

He had made sure to check it before he went out to search again. He was so sure that he found the exact location this time. Roxas would be there- the still-intact headstone only served to boast his confidence higher. One swipe of his gloved hand through the air, a little magik, and he'd be back to feeling...something.

"Don't you think you're getting a little ahead of yourself there Axie?" The bond interrupted his thoughts effortlessly. He turned to IX and shook his head, "I have to go, Demyx. I gotta bring him back."

"Aren't you being, oh yanno...selfish?"

"How's it being selfish when I'm doing it for him? Leviathan, it's always been for him Demyx," he questioned, his arms limp at his sides. The normally vibrant red-haed was numbed down ti only a false remnant of anger that he knew wasn't supposed to be there , and the fact that it was there only hurt worse.

"Becuase you're not. The reason you are so obsessed with finding him is just so you can feel something. And that's just being selfish when it comes to the rest of us! Don't you think about anyone else besides Roxas and yourself. Do you, Axel? Ever wonder about how Xigbar or the Superior, or hell, even me is doing? Go on, tell me."

It was the first time he had ever heard the sitarist raise his voice to anyone, much less himself. No, number nine was supposed to stay locked in his head humming a soft tune, according to Axel. _Woah. Why me? Why do I have such an impact on the kid? _He felt himself tense up when a pair of darkly-clad arms coiled around his torso. He tried to squirm his way out of the awkward embrace but only mangaed to turn it into a much more compromising arrangement, with Demyx's hands hugging his waitst.

Axel was just about to char IX off of him when the other nobody said something. "Dont go. Please Axel, just don't go." The voice was barely above a whisper, the words choked out and pleading. His arms dropped in defeat.

And he could almost taste it, the strange surge of near-guilt, tangy on his tounge and when he tried to swallow it lunged his stomach to his throat. The only thing he seemed capable of doing was to mutter the others name in a voice unlike his own, harsh one, "Demyx..."

"No," the blonde interjected. "You say Roxas makes you feel like you are somebody again. Well, can't you wait just a little longer because I swear I'll find someway to make you feel again, Axel. Pinky promise and everything, just don't go."

The vow shocked the red head and caused his droop languidly into the other's arms. "Demyx, why...would you do that...for me?"

"Because you make me feel the same...I just thought I'd return the favor, yanno?"

And when the younger nobody pulled his head away from the other's collar to reveal red, puffy eyeand a sad smile Axel's breath caught behind his clentched teeth. When Demyx layed a chaste kiss to VIII's cheeck before he pulled away and summoned the black portal that brought him there, Axel just stood there, unable to move or understand. He stood gapeing at the wall, hand on his burning cheek, until it was time to visit Twilight Town.

* * *

_We're not scaremongering  
This is really happening _

* * *

The Proof of Existance never lied...

He had to have proof of the information Xigbar had just bestowed on him. So, he kneeled before a broken-down headstone that layed next to his own still undamaged one. The bouquet of lillies in his gloved hand were slowly dying, decaying in the atmosphere that threatened to smother them. He shouldn't have come. No, he should have kept going and ignored the pang in his chest when the words swept through him.

He just couldn't believe that promises meant so much to the kid...

Betrayal. That's the word he had summed everything he was feeling into. Yes he was no longer his unfeeling Organization self; the Axel who manipulated other members into oblivion, the same one who had searched for his heart so foolhardy that he did not see that it was to be ripped away once he felt it with his fingertips. He betrayed the Organization many times, but that could not compare to what Roxas had done. But Axel could not find the room to blame him for what his somebody did.

"I guess I owe you some thanks, don't I?" He said with a bitter venom seeping from the words,"yeah, I got 'em back, most of them anyways. Just the important one, yanno, like: pain, remorse, anger, and this burning _desire_ to rip someone apart. I've never wanted to hurt someone so badly as I do now."

He chuckled at the thought of Superior seeing him like this, already fading away. But Axel did not fear the stronger nobody, Zexion was being a good little watch dog from his perch by the entrance. He was almost glad that the only one sneakier than himself was giving him this chance to pay his respects before he went off into battle. He knew was going to die, and that knowledge sobered him up quite a bit.

"I'm sorry this happened to you man. I'm real sorry that it took this much to keep that promise you made to me a while back. I'm going to find him. I'm going to let him know what he did for me."

When he set the lillies down on the crumbled stone he ignored the ash that had formed on the tips of the pedal and was searing the flowers a dark, smokey color. He'd have to tell VI to give them some water after all this mess was finished with, only because he knew that he'd be fine in the end.

"I almost feel like I should be confessing, and telling you that I loved you with my entire heart. Guess what, Dem? I ain't got one, so my soul'll have ta do for now. It's there too. So, thanks again for breaking me down to this shell. I'm not a nobody if I can feel, but I'm not a somebody if I don't feel everything. So you really fucked me over."

"It's time to go, Axel. Sora will be reaching us shortly." The monotone of his not-quite companion moved him to his feet. He sighed and ran a hand through his bright mane of hair, ignoring the soot that mixed into it. He was so tired. However he turned to the shattered rocks once more  
"Guess I'll be seeing you. Right after I find Rox, mkay? And then I'm going to pound you for fading away like that and making me want to kill everyone in this joint. Remember, all my soul, commit it to memory."

So when he was led out of the room, he didn't look back to see the ashen flowers smoldering. The ash ran down the stone like a river to his own flat in the ground and washed over the edge. Even if VIII missed it, there was still the cloaked schemer to smirk before turning his back to the empty graveyard.

His soul erupted into sea of flames with his final attack, but that was okay- he did get to see Roxas afterall. He just wanted to let him know that he was happy for him and that yeah, _he'd found his somebody too._

Happy endings weren't his style anyways.

* * *

_Ice age coming  
Throw it on the fire_

* * *

Okay, well, that was that.  
Zexion is there because he is adorable and I am inclined to believe he is alive, since his headstone is not ruin like the rest of the Organization's. If it is I am sorry, I don't remeber seeing it to be. Evs. So, as I said...Please read and review for the story & whatnot. Flame me. I have a Paine equipped with a Fire Eater charm, mkay loves?


End file.
